Grooming in sports is often misunderstood because it rarely looks like abuse at the beginning. It is not a single act or a sudden event. Grooming is a pattern of conduct that unfolds over time—one that involves gaining access to an athlete, building trust and dependence, gradually crossing boundaries, and creating conditions where abuse can occur and remain hidden.
For a sexual abuse attorney, this pattern is familiar. Outside survivor advocacy and legal spaces, however, grooming is still frequently minimized or reframed—as a misunderstanding, poor judgment, or behavior that somehow fell into a gray area. In reality, grooming is intentional. It exploits power, trust, and silence.
Sports settings can be particularly vulnerable to this kind of abuse. Athletic programs are structured around hierarchy. Coaches hold authority over playing time, advancement, and opportunity, and access to athletes—through training, travel, and competition—is built into the role. When that authority goes unchecked, it can create conditions where sexual abuse in sports is possible and difficult to challenge.
Sports Performance Volleyball
A well-known example that illustrates how these dynamics can operate is the case involving Rick Butler, the founder of Sports Performance, an elite club volleyball program in the Chicago suburbs. Butler has been accused by multiple former athletes of sexually abusing them when they were minors while acting as their coach in the 1980s. One player alleged that Butler raped her “hundreds” of times.
In 1995, USA Volleyball banned Butler from coaching volleyball. However, the ban was partially rescinded only five years later, and Butler resumed coaching youth volleyball.
To date, Sports Performance has coached early 20,000 girls. The program produced four Olympic medalists and nearly 100 national champions.
I played at Sports Performance in the early 2000s, when Rick Butler was still leading the organization. That experience provides firsthand familiarity with the culture, hierarchy, and power dynamics common in elite club sports programs like Sports Performance.
How grooming takes hold in sports environments
Grooming in sports often begins in ways that appear ordinary or even supportive. A coach may offer extra attention, individualized training, or mentorship framed as belief in an athlete’s potential. In competitive environments where approval is scarce and hard-earned, that attention can feel affirming.
Over time, those interactions can create emotional reliance. An athlete may begin to feel that their success—or even their place on the team—depends on maintaining the relationship. As trust deepens, boundaries start to shift. Conversations become more personal. Interactions become more private. Conduct that once might have raised concern begins to feel normal because it happens gradually.
This progression is central to many cases involving athlete sexual abuse and coach sexual abuse. Grooming works precisely because it unfolds incrementally. Each step makes the next easier to justify, harder to question, and more difficult to disclose.
Secrecy often follows. Athletes may be discouraged—explicitly or implicitly—from sharing certain interactions. Fear of losing opportunities, credibility, or support can become a powerful silencing force. When the athlete is a minor, that imbalance is even more pronounced. Minors cannot consent to sexual activity with adults in positions of authority, regardless of how the situation is framed.
In the case against Rick Butler, a former player described to the Chicago Sun Times how the grooming and ensuing abuse allegedly unfolded on a team road trip:
“He said come here, and I went into the middle of the gym and he’s holding a volleyball . . . and he goes ‘Jesus F—ing Christ,’ and he threw the ball as hard as he could against the wall,” she recalled. “So I went upstairs scared to death and he’s sitting there and he said to me, ‘You have to know you have to follow me blindly, if you have goals and you want to be great.’
“And of course, what am I going to say? Yes, I said ‘OK,’ and then he leaned over and kissed me. I mean, I was 16, I was a dork. I mean, I was a virgin. I hadn’t had a boyfriend.”
The kiss evolved into a pattern of sexual abuse, including intercourse, that went on for two years, she said.
This survivor was only 16 years old when Butler allegedly first kissed her.
Power, prestige, and dependence
Elite youth sports can intensify grooming dynamics. Programs that are nationally recognized or closely tied to college recruitment often concentrate enormous power in the hands of a small number of decision-makers.
Rick Butler was a powerful figure in under-18 volleyball and held significant influence within national youth sports structures, including the Amateur Athletic Union (AAU), which is one of the largest youth sports organizations in the US. As reported by ESPN, Sports Performance became a perennial national powerhouse, and Butler played a role in shaping the junior volleyball landscape through his involvement in major events.
For many athletes, participation in programs like Sports Performance was seen as a pathway to college scholarships and elite competition. Some families sent athletes from out of state to train there, increasing reliance on the club and its leadership. In those circumstances, the cost of speaking up can feel extraordinarily high.
This dynamic is not unique to volleyball. It appears across sports and levels, particularly in youth sports sexual abuse cases where athletes’ futures are closely tied to the approval of a single coach or organization.
Institutional failures and delayed accountability
Grooming in sports does not occur in a vacuum. Institutions play a critical role in either interrupting abuse or allowing it to persist. Clubs, leagues, and governing bodies can enable harm through lack of oversight, informal handling of complaints, or prioritizing reputation over athlete safety.
In 2016, the AAU was sued for allegedly allowing Butler to continue coaching an under-18 girls’ team despite prior accusations. The lawsuit raised broader questions about how youth sports organizations respond when concerns are raised—and what happens when the accused holds significant influence.
Despite longstanding allegations, meaningful accountability did not occur for decades. In December 2017, the U.S. Center for SafeSport permanently barred Butler from coaching USA Volleyball teams due to sexual misconduct involving a minor.
That timeline reflects a pattern seen repeatedly in cases of sexual assault in sports. Institutions often act only after survivors persist, public scrutiny increases, or external pressure forces intervention. By then, the harm has often compounded.
Why understanding grooming matters
Understanding grooming is essential for prevention, survivor validation, and accountability. It reframes abuse away from harmful myths—that it was a misunderstanding, a consensual situation, or an isolated lapse—and toward what it actually is: the exploitation of power and access over time.
For survivors, recognizing grooming can be deeply validating. It helps explain why the abuse was difficult to identify or resist and reinforces that responsibility lies with the adult and the institutions that failed to protect, not with the athlete.
For sports organizations, recognizing grooming patterns is critical to preventing harm before it escalates. Policies that focus only on prohibiting explicit misconduct often miss the behaviors that precede abuse.
Legal context
Civil law increasingly recognizes grooming as part of sexual abuse, not separate from it. Evidence of grooming is often central to establishing liability, particularly where sports organizations failed to protect athletes or intervene despite warning signs. Clubs, leagues, and governing bodies may face civil accountability for systemic failures that allowed abuse to occur.
Survivors’ rights and legal timelines vary by state. States such as Illinois, Colorado, and New York have enacted reforms expanding survivor protections and, in some circumstances, the time available to pursue civil claims related to sexual abuse. The options available depend on the facts of the case and the law that applies.
Conclusion
Grooming in sports is incremental, intentional, and enabled by environments that concentrate power while minimizing oversight. Understanding how grooming operates is essential to protecting athletes, supporting survivors, and holding institutions accountable.
Recognizing patterns early—and responding to them—can prevent harm and help create safer athletic environments for young people who place their trust in them.